Debbie Gail Zane

Are you experiencing tension and disconnection in your relationship with your teen or young adult child?

Even if right now you are dealing with challenges with your son or daughter, a more supportive relationship is not only possible it is what you were meant for

What if you could love and support your son or daughter through these challenges while building a closer relationship?

• Learn how to connect to their emotional world so they feel you two are on the same side.  When you truly understand what they feel, not only do they feel seen, heard and understood, they feel you are on their side.

• Learn how to set boundaries to protect your mental and emotional well being.  Setting boundaries, not walls, allows love and empathy to flow back and forth while preventing you from burning out.

• Learn how to deal with difficult emotions that come up so that you are not taking negative emotions out on those you love but handling them in a positive way so you reach an empowered emotional state.

If you want to learn more, comment below or DM me.

I went through difficulties and challenges as a single mom of three kids.  My oldest son suffered from mental illness and addiction, and passed away at the age of 26.  I am so grateful that we had a close loving relationship and every day I cherish my memories with him.  Not only did I find peace amidst the tears during this journey, I found my purpose.  I am passionate about helping parents in their relationships with their teens and young adults who are dealing with any challenges because I know it is not an easy journey and our lives and our relationships with our children are precious.

Join my private Facebook group for parents of teens and young adults

If you are a parent who is feeling frustrated with the communication with your teen or young adult, here are some steps you can take to improve communication:

Be a good listener.  As a parent, it can be easy to forget to be a good listener.  You may be so busy talking about what you want them to do and not do or what you think about something that happened, that you forget about listening.  Listening allows them to feel seen and heard and improves your connection, ultimately improving your relationship.  And when you let go of the need to fix things, you send a message that you trust them to figure things out.

Let go of the judgment.  Judging can be with your words but it doesn’t have to be.  It can also be with body language, such as rolling your eyes, crossing your arms tightly, or sighing.  When you validate some of your child’s feelings they are experiencing (the ones you agree with) and minimize others, you are placing your own judgment on which circumstances are worthy of these feelings.  Let them know that you understand whatever they are feeling is real.

Offer your support without trying to control.  They may just want to know you are there to listen and are a loving support in their life.

When you listen without judgment, your teen or young adult is much more likely to come to you in difficult situations, such as if they get into trouble.  They will trust you and feel safe.

My children, who are now in their twenties, have said to me that they always felt they could come to me with their struggles because they never felt judged and they always felt supported.

If you want to learn more tips for building a more supportive relationships with your teen or young adult despite the challenges, join my new Facebook group for parents https://www.facebook.com/groups/3075560526105218/?ref=share

3 Steps for Finding Peace and Love Amidst the Tears: A FREE challenge for parents of teens or young adults who have mental illness or addiction.

If you are a parent of a teen or young adult suffering from mental illness and/or addiction, are you frustrated with constant conflicts with your son or daughter?  Is your relationship deteriorating?  Would you like to build a more supportive relationship with your teen/young adult?  I see many parents struggling in their relationships with their children, feeling confused, worried, and perplexed as to how to handle the difficulties that arise.  I can teach you the tools to rise above the fear and self doubt, navigate the unique challenges you are facing as a parent, and rebuild your loving relationship.

And I am reminded of my own struggles…

I went through these same challenges as a single mom. My oldest son was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and became addicted to drugs and alcohol.  He passed away at the age of 26.  I am so grateful that we had a close loving relationship and every day I cherish my memories with him. Not only did I find peace amidst the tears during this journey, I found my purpose.

In two weeks, I will be doing a FREE 3 day challenge where I will be discussing the challenges and fears of parenting teens or young adults with mental illness and/or addiction and providing action steps to take now.  If you are interested, use the link in the comments to register or send me a message